Date Archives September 2015

“I am a Rebel Reader”

Books & Reading

I live in a free country.

Most of us do.

And that is something that should never be taken for granted. However at times we come across certain occurrences that leave you to question freedom itself.

I am not here to talk to about issues like freedom of speech or the freedom to choose your government but something even more grave and that my folks is the ‘Freedom to Read’. I mean if I cannot read what I want then what the hell am I to do in life?

The national book community in the United States of America decided to recognize ‘challenged books’ and created the initiative to support the ‘Freedom to Read’ under the name of ‘Banned Books Week’.

Banned Books Week is a nationwide promotion by the American Library Association (ALA) in collaboration with many other sponsors like AAP, ABFE, NCTE who have tried to draw attention to such censorship, and condemn it. I have always taken part of this movement whilst sitting in Pakistan and read banned books during the term designated each year. This year I involved my book club, #KHIBookSwap to join in and celebrate the banned books week.

Now let’s get personal people, I for one have had a very strong relationship with banned books. And yes, I consider myself, a rebel reader.

You see Mousier, Le fruit défendu est le doux!
And by that I mean: The forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest my friend!

Some of my all-time favorite books have been banned since their publication including Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl, Animal Farm, The Scarlet Letter and the Fifty Shades of Grey.

Yeah, I read about SEX and liked it, get over it! (I am going to write a whole another post as to why girls pretend to hate FSOG and exactly why these are the girls who doll up for the theatre.! Ohhh Yes I will!!!)

Well getting back to our topic of discussion today. Banned Books!

Some of us would definitely like to see FSOG banned for good but why on earth would someone ban Harry Potter? Am I right? Well today, I am here to explain to you the grounds on which some of our beloved titles were banned upon their release. I am going to make this easy by enlisting the latest list of challenged books that the ALA’s Office for Intellectual Freedom (OIF) created based on reports from libraries, schools, and the media on attempts to ban books in communities across the country. (And yes the following list is authentic!)

It’s not always sex or obscene language that leads to a ban, many times, traditions, customs and even something as valuable as viewpoints that cause such an uproar.

The top ten most frequently challenged books of 2014 include:

1) The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie
Reasons: anti-family, cultural insensitivity, drugs/alcohol/smoking, gambling, offensive language, sex education, sexually explicit, unsuited for age group, violence. Additional reasons: “depictions of bullying”.

2) Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
Reasons: gambling, offensive language, political viewpoint. Additional reasons: “politically, racially, and socially offensive,” “graphic depictions”.

3) And Tango Makes Three by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell
Reasons: Anti-family, homosexuality, political viewpoint, religious viewpoint, unsuited for age group. Additional reasons: “promotes the homosexual agenda”.

4) The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
Reasons: Sexually explicit, unsuited for age group. Additional reasons: “contains controversial issues”.

5) It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
Reasons: Nudity, sex education, sexually explicit, unsuited to age group. Additional reasons: “alleges it child pornography”.

6) Saga by Brian Vaughan and Fiona Staples
Reasons: Anti-Family, nudity, offensive language, sexually explicit, and unsuited for age group. Additional reasons: unsolicited.

7) The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
Reasons: Offensive language, unsuited to age group, violence.

8) The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
Reasons: drugs/alcohol/smoking, homosexuality, offensive language, sexually explicit, unsuited for age group. Additional reasons: “date rape and masturbation”.

9) A Stolen Life by Jaycee Dugard
Reasons: drugs/alcohol/smoking, offensive language, sexually explicit, and unsuited for age group.

10) Drama by Raina Telgemeier
Reasons: sexually explicit.

Well, I guess SEX and NUDITY make most of the list, ehhh?
Ban the books will you?
Why not ban the multi-billion dollar porn industry first???

Jealousy I tell you. Jealousy.
They know.
Readers rule the world.

So to show them that we will not be played to their ruse, let’s pick up a banned book this week, and read all the dirty scenes over and over and over and overrrrrr! 😉 *seductive voice*

10 Things Women should Know in Late 20s

Family & Personal Feminism

Do Selfies seem silly to you? And yet your Instagram feed is quite glamorous?

Do you despise men and their antics? Yet treat yourself with a shopping spree around Valentine’s Day?

Are you just settling in your career? And yet doubt your current job?

Chances are you are in your late 20s!

Meg Jay, a clinical psychologist explains your 20s in her book as ‘The Defining Decade’ where you are caught somewhere between responsibility and experimentation. Perhaps the most significant decade of your life as the choices you make here not only craft your future but design your entire existence for as long as you live.

However this does not mean that you avoid self-exploration or your shot at happiness. In fact the late 20s define who you really are as opposed to your image during the university years. Allow me to share with you all, my wisdom of all my years as a working woman in her 20s. I am pretty wisdomist! *Joey Style* =D

I am for one amongst those many ladies, who are not girls anymore and not yet women and there are a few things that you should know by the time you reach the big three-O!

• Dress to your Heart – Not what People think Looks Good
You already know that you are too old for glitter and bubblegum pink but it is time for you to stock your wardrobe with pieces you find appealing. What other people think looks good on you has nothing to do with reality. Stick to your taste. And stick to what makes you feel good and beautiful. The ones who disagree probably spent their last weekend all dolled up for a movie theatre! (Jeez people! Grow up! High heels, open tresses and Russian red lippies for the cinema? Sheessshhhh!)

• Be Fearless – Fight for your Right
You might not succeed each time but its high time you stand up for what you believe in! Whether it’s a raise or a pet, you need to make sure people know you are not hiding behind a comfortable cubicle anymore. If you are ready to take on the world, you first need to ensure you are not part of the crowd.

• Quit a Job you cannot Stand
By now you know the difference between a difficult boss and a fucking psycho boss. Trust your gut and make an informed decision based on your experience and interest. Instead of giving up, maneuver your life in the right direction and believe me when I say, you’ll know your true calling!

• Learn to Spend Wisely and Save Along the Way
You do not have to be a financial expert to start saving and it can always start with even the change at the bottom of your bag. Do not empty your bank account each month, or perhaps hold back the next time there is a sale at Khaadi or Sana Safinaz. You need to know life is unpredictable and even a hundred bucks sometimes can prove to be life-saving. (If you have no idea what I am talking about then you are obviously NOT a working woman in Pakistan.)

• Treat your Temple Right
You have already done everything you can to strain your body; it’s time to avoid any permanent damage. Remember the body you have…is the only body you get. So treat it nice, eat healthy, avoid late nights, make water your new best friend and take the stairs instead of the nicely air-conditioned elevator once in a while. A 30 minute workout for 5 days a week and your body will thank you forever!

• Mean Girls are Girls not Women
It is now time for you to distance yourself from all the bitch-drama this world has to offer. Toxic and clingy people should not be a part of your day, at least not every day. High-school is over and so is giving a damn fuck!!!

• Find a Good Dentist
You brush two times a day. Occasionally floss. Change your toothbrush every three months. And your teeth are in perfectly good condition. Think again. By the time your body reaches its 30s your teeth have seen everything from the Stone Age to the Medieval Times and more. Find a good dentist. Make frequent visits perhaps every three months. You’ll be thanking me later personally for this.

• Learn to Say No
Do I really have to explain this? Know your limitations and oblige them. You are not 19 anymore. And that’s a good thing. Spending the Saturday night infront of the telly is totally normal. You no longer should function on account of guilt or force. And knowing when to say no not only means in terms of booze, smoke or sex, it also matters when it comes to relationships, friendships and the last slice of the pizza!

• He is not Waiting around the next Corner
Your significant other is not going to pop up in a bookstore or offer to buy you a drink (non-alcoholic one) just because you look good whilst at a party at Del Frio or Gloria Jeans. Suck it up, and move on. Either say yes to an arrange-marriage or stop day-dreaming about meeting a handsome stranger and falling madly in love at first sight.

• There is no such thing as a Best Friend
Enough said. Period.

Nida Paracha: The Original Modiste

People & More

Throughout our lives, every single day, we drape ourselves with clothes. Our clothes represent our personality, our mood and even our ambitions. But have we ever stopped to think of the people who invest their lifetime in creating that favorite black dress of yours? One woman against all odds has broken norms in Pakistan and has held together her unit of ancestral craftsmen for the love of cloth and design.

Married and a mother of three, Nida Paracha inherited her love for the cloth and design from her mother. It was all meant to be – to design, and style and no one could steer her away from her destiny; not even her own decision to pursue a completely different form of art.

A painter and poet at heart, Nida fondly remembers her mother engrossed in dress design right in the middle of her lounge on a dining table. And I had the pleasure to catch some of her heart-warming stories in the flash just before her latest Eid Collection unveiled this Saturday.

In an industry where everyone is caught in a never-ending race to creating a brand name, Nida Paracha has dedicated her time towards extending her legacy. Her vision for her work knows no boundaries coupled with her down-to-earth and unpretentious nature translates clearly into her masterpieces.

On Saturday, September 19, 2015 I was amongst the many who witnessed her latest Eid Collection during an exhibition at Prince Jewelers & Diamond Arena in Karachi. And let me tell you something straight away, I could not believe that designers clothes were even possible in such affordable price brackets. I was baffled at the quality of cloth, design and stitching showcased at such prices. I’d like to thank Nida for making designer clothes affordable for middle, working-class women like yours truly.

Another thing that struck me is that her collection had definitive divisions, meaning there was certainly a huge variety for your festive palate but I could even see pieces that were apt for a luncheon with your girls, pieces that were totally appropriate for work and even ones that could be worn to your brother’s engagement. Such an eclectic taste could only come from someone who does it for the love of it all!
And Nida, I must say, your hand painted, chiffon Kaftans and Drapes were to die for!

Following is the transcript for the interview with Nida Paracha:

Ifrah Waqar – Where does your artistic influence come from and when did you start making clothing?

Nida Paracha – It all began in my early years, watching my mother taking frequent trips to all corners of India and Bangladesh. Upon her return our friends and relatives would pour in, and be in complete awe of the luxurious and exotic fabrics she had curated. She would involve me along the way and ask me to learn karayi or work with sitara. She always advised me to work in fashion where as I, at first wasn’t interested at all but today, I am here and I cannot possibly imagine doing anything else.

Ifrah Waqar – Everyone has to start somewhere. What was your first job?

Nida Paracha – My first job or assignment whatever you’d like to call it happened to track me down in Bangkok, I was traveling with my husband when I met a lady who inquired my help in Pakistan with her design project. When she saw me in my own designs, she asked me if I could prepare an entire exhibition for her. I was new to this world and explained the same but she insisted that I do this, and I am glad that I did that was my first professional job and it paved my path.

Ifrah Waqar – What is the biggest lesson that you have learned since you started your company?

Nida Paracha – Unfortunately it is not a good one. With everything going digital, we have forgotten our roots. This country is filled with unbelievable talent and skilled craftsmen but we no longer remember that. I must credit designers like Nida Azwer and Sania Maskatiya who have taken the liberty to go back to our arts like block printing and reserved what is left of our heritage, I want to follow the ideals set by Bunto Appa & Sughran Khala (Kazmi). I strive to make certain all these techniques including Tie-dye, and hand painting and many others come together in my collection.

Ifrah Waqar – How difficult it is to survive in this industry with so much of competition?

Nida Paracha – I am not part of the direct industry per say – if you noticed. I am just following my roots. Take my label’s name for instance Parachabafi which literally means, ‘millers of cloth’ and my ancestors who have been involved in this craft for age. I am not in it for the money; I am just doing what’s in my blood. I do not intend to market my brand name only; my intention is to create clothes that make me people come alive.

Ifrah Waqar – How do you describe your fashion brand and style?

Nida Paracha – I would have to say versatile. I like to create a piece that allows you to dress it up or dress it down. A piece that is affordable and yet paired with your statement piece can be worn to even a Valima Ceremony.

Ifrah Waqar – How do you see the Digital/Social Media affecting fashion in Pakistan?

Nida Paracha – It has certainly added a new dimension to this field of work. Building a clientèle and engaging your community has become easy. People can reach out to you from far and wide and yet you connect to them on a personal level.

Ifrah Waqar – What advice do you have for aspiring fashion designers?

Nida Paracha – Give yourself time in this field. Earn a degree and accept the learning curve with open arms. A degree is very important in such a field especially. I do not possess a degree and I know the struggles that crossed my path because of it. Before you decide to start your own brand name, give yourself the time to stumble along the way. You need to know that this industry expects your heart and soul, invest your time, gain experience and then take it to the next level.

Ifrah Waqar – Who would you love to style?

Nida Paracha – My mother. She has been my inspiration through and through. I wish she was here and I could make something exclusively for her. (Smiles in wonderment) Her persona and her style has truly been the cornerstone of each and every collection I have ever designed.

Ifrah Waqar – Thank you so much for your time and thank you for making me a part of your delightful journey.

Nida Paracha – It was my pleasure Ifrah, it was lovely speaking to you. Thank you.

If you are looking for a piece that truly defines you then reach Nida Paracha at: Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.

5 Books by Paulo Coelho that should be on your Booklist

Books & Reading

Paulo Coelho is a celebrated author of some of the most inspiring tales. He was born in Brazil on 24th, August, 1947. He had a very turbulent childhood and was a defiant teenager so his parents sent him to an asylum thrice. As Coelho reached the age of 38, he experienced a spiritual awakening while journeying through Spain. However, one book that created a frenzy in the literature circles was The Alchemist. The book nearly sold thirty five million copies worldwide.

Here, we have compiled a list of top 5 most inspiring and poignant books penned by Paulo Coelho. If you are interested to purchase these books, they are available exclusively at a trusted online marketplace.

1) Eleven Minutes

Eleven Minutes is based on the story of a youthful prostitute called Maria, whose first encounter with love leaves her brokenhearted. At a very tender age, she realizes that she will never be able to find love that will last forever. Then a stroke of luck takes her to Geneva, where she dreams of making a fortune and becoming famous yet she ends up as a prostitute. The protagonist then faces a dilemma, she has to choose between following a destructive path of sexual pleasure, or risking everything she has for the mere possibility of a type of sacred sex.

2) By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept

This is a heart wrenching story about a woman and her voyage to find herself. Pilar is the name of the protagonist who reunites with her childhood friend who has spent the last decade of his life journeying around the world, where he learns about different cultures and religions. He tries to enlighten Pilar with the knowledge he has acquired over the years. It is a poetic story of transformation of Pilar. This journey that Pilar and her friend undertake is filled with resentment, difficulties and demon of blame.

3) The Fifth Mountain

For a truly electrifying reading experience, The Fifth Mountain should definitely be on your reading list. In this book Coelho retells the tale of Prophet Elijah who had to flee from Israel. He falls in love with a widow in Zarephath. As the story unfolds, Elijah’s new found love and dreams are cut short. It is an incredible work of historical fiction where Paulo Coelho discovers the issues of faith that are relevant in the present century as well as in the 9th century B.C.

4) Inspirations by Paulo Coelho

There is no doubt that Paulo Coelho is the most loved story teller. In this book he has selected some of his personal favorite pieces from the literary classics. The author displays amazing skill in formatting the collection into four distinct substances that are eternal and uncreated: Water, Air, Fire and Earth. This books includes classics from inspiring authors including, Oscar Wilde, Mary Shelley, Christian Andersen and D.H. Lawrence.

5) Manual of the Warrior of the Light

Paulo Coelho is the most distinguished storyteller of our time. With Manual of the Warrior of Light, he has presented a unique selection of philosophical tales that will excite the true readers everywhere. Every passage that the author has penned down invites the reader to embrace the life with all its uncertainties, to fulfill their destiny and to live out their dreams.

Disclaimer: The above article is not penned by Ifrah Waqar. It is a collaboration between kaymu.pk and the blog in-question.

Arsalan Hyder: The Game Changer

People & More

Celebrity or talent management is not a newly introduced concept in Pakistan. We sit comfortably amongst many top talent management agencies. Did you notice I used the word agency and not company?

The difference between an agency and a company lies in the thin line between a souteneur (pardon the obscene comparison) and a marketer. A management company is more interested in creating your brand name rather than focusing on the end-deal. In a country, where cricket is next to religion, there is certainly an astounding lack of athlete management companies or even niche agencies.

I mean, who manages your cricket stars?

Who looks after your hockey heroes?

Who takes care of the god-damn, Olympics winning team????

Who represents them in the commercial market?

Not that no-one, ever noticed this huge gap, but one man, against all odds (who by the way was not a millionaire at birth) decided to un-tap a market others perceived to be just cricketing stars and advertisements for a certain leading, soft-drink brand. (I am soooo getting spammed, once I post this online).

Allow me introduced to you, Arsalan H. Shah or known to his friends and peers as Arsalan Hyder. The one who knew there was more to athlete management than cricket and world cup campaigns. He is Founder and Director to Global Athlete Management Experts (GAME), Pakistan’s leading athlete/sports management company.

I was fortunate enough to request him for an exclusive, never-been-conceptualized-interview (and he even graciously agreed to pay for the coffee). The whole-point of this interview is to understand why a man, who comes from a learned family, leaves his well-established IT business and sets foot in the macabre that is athlete and sports management!

Location: Opera Cafe & Patisserie, Ramada Plaza, Karachi,
Time: 07:31 PM
Attire: Semi-formal
Status: Inkling
Photograph Courtesy: Mobeen Ansari

Ifrah Waqar – First of all thank you so very much for taking the time out for this exclusive piece of interview.

Arsalan Hyder – It’s my pleasure. Shoot!

Question – In a country where people only know agents and do not understand what managers are, you chose to call yourself a manager, why?

Answer – I knew that I wanted to change the whole perception. I wanted to above all, create awareness and make sure that people, athletes and the brands understood the difference between an agent and a manager. I was often asked to change myself to an agent to be able to land deals, but I did not intend to cut out a one-time deal, I wanted to work with leading athletes, set an example and bridge the way to an untapped market.

Question – What made you take this step? I mean why even consider establishing an athlete/sports management to stars already known and famous?

Answer – (Smiles) for me in Pakistan, where athletes/celebrities are only considered to attend weddings or appear as guests at events, I knew that there was no one to tell them of their market-worth. I wanted to eradicate this entire trend and bridge the gap between the brands and the stars.

Question – You decided to break away from norms and establish an athlete/sports management company. The obstacles must have been massive. Were they?

Answer – That’s the fun part! (Laughs) Lack of awareness for endorsements was something my team and I had to face a lot. The vision was limited. People have been involved in this business-model around the world and are creating employment, patronage and profitable opportunities every day. So why not in Pakistan! Other than that, finding the right formal people to work with and lack of professionalism is what my team and I have struggled with. But thankfully, and with the Grace of Almighty, I was blessed to receive tremendous encouragement from the industry and we are gearing towards the next level.

Question – Do you consider yourself a leader of this niche market?

Answer – Leader, manager, whatever you’d like to tag me. All I know that people in Pakistan and from around the world give me a call and inquire for an athlete who is not necessarily a cricketer. I want to be able to guide my team together as a unit towards a common goal.

Question – Do you exercise control around you?

Answer – Yes. I have to. Ideally this a one-man game but I believe in as I said in team work, I don’t shy away from delegating but yes I’d like to keep information of everyone and everything around me.

Question – What traits you think an athlete manager should possess?

Answer – Vision, perseverance, networking, and time Management and above all love what you do; do what you love.

Question – To what do you owe your success?

Answer – My team and hard work. Working with top professionals from around the world requires you to work with the best and I was blessed with an adequate learning curve and the best team possible.

Question – Can you tell us about a few of your clients?

Answer – We have worked with leading international brands like Pepsi, Procter and Gamble, Ariel, MoneyGram, Tack Kuwait, Shirzanan Global, Viacom18, Air Tel, as well as catered to big names in Pakistan including Ufone, QMobile, HBL, Voice, Dany Technologies, HELLO Pakistan! And this just makes 10% of our portfolio.

I have worked with leading Pakistani athletes like Jehangir Khan, Sohail Abbas, Shoaib Akhtar, Kiran Khan, Saeed Ajmal, Shahid Afridi, Ahmed Shehzad, Umar Akmal, Misbah-ul-Haq,Umar Gul, Inzamam-ul-Haq, Azhar Mehmood, Saqlain Mushtaq, Moin Khan, Muhammd Yusuf etc as well many international names like Brett Lee, Yusuf Pathan, Yuvraj, Scott Styris, Herschelle Gibbs, Adam Hollioake and more.

I take pride in exclusively taking care of the Legend, Wasim Akram’s business and philanthropic engagements. (Smiles) But there can altogether be a whole other interview on him. I owe my success in this field to the mentorship from Wasim Akram and I cannot be more thankful to this trust within my decisions and strategies.

Question – You have recently surfaced as the Manager and Treasurer to ‘The Akram Foundation’. Can you tell us a little about your plans for the foundation?

Answer – The foundation is the brainchild of Wasim and Shaniera Akram, and together with their support, we as TeamTAF plan to initiate and establish a platform where anyone and everyone can come forward with a cause. If you or anyone has a project or need any kind of aid, please come forward, we make certain the end-goal is in-sync with our objective and we strike. We uphold our motto: Help Us, Help Pakistan very seriously. Go online, share your project, and my team and I will take care of the rest.

Question – What advice would you give to future athlete managers in the country?

Answer – Take the right counsel. Study the pioneers and follow your heart. Network and bond with your client. And the money will eventually flow.

Question – Marketing, Advertising, Information Technology and now Philanthropy; what is next for Arsalan Hyder?

Answer – For now my focus remains in expanding my company particularly in the Europe and the Middle East and make continued efforts to taking ‘The Akram Foundation’ globally. I would like to invite the youth of Pakistan to join our efforts and fight illiteracy and insolvency right out.

Ifrah Waqar – Thank you so much for your time and your valuable insights.

Arsalan Hyder – My pleasure.

“A Hair Gone Rogue…”

Family & Personal People & More

And today you are in for a real treat folks, the cascading story of my ordeal and the lovely tale of a follicle gone rogue.

I must warn you, if you have a weak stomach or are completely against females revealing personal details, look away!

You should not be here. (Best you go back to that Facebook video displaying the many traits of a rising movie star)

Hmmmm…

I guess you did not pay heed to my warning. Well then, let’s get into it. Shall we?

Once upon a time, a young, beautiful maiden, with raven flocks and dark circles decided to confess her true feelings towards the timeless adornment that is a skinny jeans. She simply could not resist its charm and wished never to part ways. Little did she know, destiny will forever steer them away, and time shall remember this as a tale of horrors and eternal plague.

You obviously have no idea what I am talking about and by now you’re considering closing this tab. Well that is totally your choice but come on; you made the effort to open this link, did you not? Give it some time. A tale of such epic proportions deserves a little patience and precision.

Well, where were we?

Yes, it all started on a humid, Saturday night in August, 2015, when I decided to reach out for my book and get cosy under the blanket. And yes the air conditioning was on but I do not support ACs at all. All of a sudden, a ripple in my tummy and my infancy-years’ potty training made me rush to my washroom (Is it a washroom, a bathroom or a toilet? This question has haunted me for years). I prefer to call it a ladies room but let’s get real, here I am, sitting and talking about excretion, can’t get fancy can I?) So, anyways, 10 minutes down the line, I came out all sweaty and disgusted, I was suffering from extreme diarrhea and not the nice brown one. Take my word for it. I came to the realization that I also had fever. Now, normally, I am a strong, big-girl, but diarrhea is a little scary to me. Owing to the fact that the last time I had diarrhea, my father was in the hospital. (We all have absurd and illogical fears, just admit it).

I approached my Mom, and told her about my condition. She gave me plain biscuits, a glass of juice (I think it was Orange) and a tablet. My fever was not helping either and Mom told me I am not supposed to sleep in my bedroom tonight. I slept with her in her room, she was being you know a typical Mom, so she could check up on me during the night.

In the morning, I felt surprisingly better, my fever had subsided and my diarrhea was much more in control (Get it? In control? Hahaha. Hmmm. I thought it was funny – moving on).

My Sunday passed, relatively normal and I just had to use the facilities a few times. Monday morning dawned and owing to my routine, I dressed up for work. Put on black jeans, apple green top, a messy-bun, minimal jewellery, my signature kohl eyes and my promise-bracele,t and I was off to a day of hard-core athlete and sports management. (Actually that day, I remember only figuring out where my Boss spent the last transaction he made =P).

Around lunchtime when I used the facilities, yet again, I felt a burning sensation around my thigh.

Well, what I found was a small red bump, around my inner, right thigh. It was soar to touch and the bump had a teeny-tiny opening at the center. Thankfully to my 5 years in medicine (And no, I am not a doctor, I am a Biotechnologist by qualification), I at once, recognized, the pain in my ass (pardon my language).

In spite of my most cherished belief, I fired up my laptop, went online and Googled, an ingrown follicle, or commonly known as ‘Munn Turr Baal’ in Urdu. Owing to my symptoms, I confirmed my earlier diagnosis and also learned that diarrhea and fever are its onset indicators. I did not notify my Mom about it, she already has a million things on her plate, and that my friend was my first mistake.

I reached out for my trusty, ‘Hum-Dard Marham’ and applied a generous amount to the bump and its surrounding area. I convinced myself that this will heal itself in a few days and like always my handy-balm will take care of it. Sadly, I was badly mistaken. The next day, I wore another of my skinny pants to work and that was my second mistake.

Over the next 3 days, the bump got redder, bigger and more painful. And my tight fitting clothes were adding to the problem. I finally told my Mom and obviously got a scolding of a lifetime. The bump now was covered with a thin film containing cream-colored pus indicating that I had angered it.

Next came the home-remedies just after I applied for my first ever leave from work in over five and a half years. Imagine explaining your boss that you cannot come to work because you have a skin condition that does not permit appropriate office attire!

My Nani (great-grandmother) made this special covering for me, with basil seeds soaked in water and lined on a thin muslin cloth, cut in a circle with a whole in the middle. It was to soak the bump’s pus and then burst. And for your information that is how an ingrown hair or folliculitis (inflammation of the hair follicles) heals, it is supposed to burst! Well the basil seeds did not help although it did for a cousin of mine. I also took worthy advice of a doctor-friend of mine and coated the bump with an antibiotic cream, Fucidin of Leo Pharmaceuticals. And it helped with the redness immediately.

Two days later when the pain was unbearable, and even the slightest of touch led me to scream, I finally gave up on my retaliation against seeing a doctor. I went to an ER of a hospital in my vicinity, upon checking the doctor prescribed a dose of the antibiotic – Augmentin (GlaxoSmithKline) which is basically a combination of amoxicillin and clavulanate potassium for 5 days and then a small surgery (incision and drainage) to remove the pus and bacteria. I weeped like a baby upon hearing the word ‘operate’.

I spent the next 5 days, lying in bed, murmuring in pain and hoping to Almighty that He forgives me of my sins. I walked around like a Penguin, (a fat-penguin to be exact according to my baby brother) and barely ate. The antibiotics added to my diarrhea problem, coating my mouth with a smelly film that would just not go away! The doctor also asked me to apply Polyfax of GlaxoSmithKline to the infected area. But honestly, it did not good for me, I continued with Fucidin application.

After 5 days, I returned to the hospital and the doctors asked me to come the next day during OPD hours and the operation will take place at 11:00 AM. I couldn’t help but cry right in the middle of the ER. As we all know, mother knows best, my Mom was just not convinced with the verdict and she forced me to another hospital in the city, a rather expensive but known to be trusted widely. There in the ER, a doctor looked at my thigh, slightly pressed it and said this did not need surgery. I smiled like a toothless baby upon seeing its feeding bottle. She was very nice and explained me that it no longer needs any kind of operation but you have been give the wrong medicine and the wrong measures to accelerate the healing.

She prescribed me a week-long of steroids, 4 pills, every 4 hours and periodic cleaning of the area with regular soap and water. No alcohol preps. No fancy, anti-bacterial cleaning agents. My relief knew no bounds. I spent the next week almost, filling my body with steroids and praying against a hormonal-imbalance. It came with extreme diarrhea but with the Grace of Almighty Allah, my bump seemed to agree with the dosage and I noticed betterment in my condition. I tried pressing the bump, as per the doctor’s advice, each time I cleaned it and every time, cream-coloured pus coupled with blood oozed out and left me light-headed. Keeping the infected area open and dry was definitely my true saviour. But sadly, mine never burst but may be that makes me all the more special. 😉 And my trips to the office wearing Hawaiian skirts was definitely an experience to remember.

Today marks one month to my ordeal, the bump has reduced, pus has cleared out but a tiny elevation remains which will probably leave a purple scar for good. I am no longer on antibiotics or steroids however my diarrhea has not ceased to exist. A month-long of Delhi-belly has left me weak and stunned. I am now completing a course of Flagyl (metronidazole) of Sanofi-Aventis Pakistan Limited and hoping for this torment to end already.

You are probably wondering, I wasted the last 15 minutes of your life by posting this mundane encounter online with no religious, social or political significance! The reason, I penned my tale is to a) create awareness against this ingrown hair phenomenon and b) to elucidate the importance of proper diagnosis in any kind of medical situation.

I lost my father to late-diagnosis from a money-making and scheming team of doctors.

I lost one of my brothers to improper diagnosis upon his accident.

So you see how personally, I feel about this issue.

If you see a bump, anywhere on your body; for the Love of God do not ignore it. Tell your parents, spouse or a friend immediately. Go see a doctor. Take a second opinion. And follow it thoroughly. Look what a scanty piece of hair did to me! I am seriously scared of wearing pants now.

If you are reading this then I forward you my gratitude for your valuable time. And I request you to say a prayer for the well-being of every living being on earth!

Manto: The Thin Line between Passion and Obsession

Movies & Entertainment 2 Comments

Before I even attempt to writing a movie review (air quotes), I feel it is my responsibility to tell you all that I am no Anu Aunty (Anupama Chopra) and I can hardly distinguish between cinematic brilliance and commercial paranoia. And the following is just my personal rant on the movie in-question.

However, I can say without a shadow of doubt that ‘Manto’ introduced me to the genius that my country is capable of. The story of a man who wrote beyond reason or rhyme has managed to do the unthinkable: made me want to read Urdu Literature.

Before we even begin to explore the many layers of this picturesque masterpiece, I want to take this moment and forward my gratitude to Sarmad Khoosat not because he chose this subject but for the sole reason that he decided to portray this infamous protagonist. His commitment to his character not only translates on-screen but also reminds us of the phenomenon that the writer was.

The opening sequence of the movie in hues of grey, with vivid red splashed all over is nothing short of sheer genius. I hope the people, and the film critics of this country understand and appreciate how beautifully this sequence has depicted everything that is bad about our society. I felt as if I was watching some Hollywood, Oscar winning direction and little did I know that there was more to come.

The first half of the movie mainly deals with the many characters that Manto penned and invited the wrath of many simultaneously. The presence of many familiar yet celebrated faces of the small screen pretty much adorn Manto’s characters in essence and soul. I was particularly moved by Sania Saeed’s performance as Safiya/Beghum Manto who did full-justice to illustrating unconditional and patient love of a wife (including lighting a cigarette for her husband). I don’t know why but I just kept feeling sorry for her character – even more so than Manto himself. Does that make me a Feminist?

I have no authority to critic on Saadat Hasan Manto’s writings but his very writings for which he had to face trials multiple times stand true today as they did back then. His writings though perceived obscene and ghastly are in my personal view perfectly raised with this movie.

No review of this movie will ever be complete without endless praise for the cinematography and editing. The intensity of Manto’s stories and darkness his characters carried are shown in the rawest form possible and that is perhaps the best feature of the entire experience. Near the end of the movie, I did feel a little drag surfacing, you are certain that a scene displaying his insanity is the end and then bang – you are back to the storyline. The end did however come with some astounding voice-over.

The end credits precede with a short history of the writer and I thought that was definitely a nice, international touch or may be I just like reading a lot even in a movie.

Another thing that is of no-cinematic significance but seized ‘my attention’ is the attention to detail and I am not talking about costumes or the backdrops. You are completely convinced that you are in the 1950s right from bleeding lipsticks to the green-white cream cake. The ‘cigarette ki dabbi’ and the clipboard were too authentic to be just film-props.

All in all, you need to get up from that comfortable couch, start your engines and go to your nearest theatre. I was sincerely and not entirely swayed by the current revolution of Pakistani Cinema but this movie has ensured me that Lollywood is here to stay!

And if Sarmad Khoosat by some miracle, lands on this review, please for the Love of God, dub the movie in English, not just subtitles but dub the entire movie and release it worldwide!!!

Thank you Mr.Khoosat for Manto. Thank you so very much.